I’m lovin’ it

McDonald’s does it again, sputters the action alert headline from the American Family Association’s Don Wildmon.

What is it this time, you ask? Well, apparently McDonald’s sponsored and purchased a half-page ad in the program for a 2007 Summit on workplace equality. (Pssst. Mister Wildmon, you’ll want to direct your crack team of investigators to check out the sponsors of Out & Equal’s 2008 Summit, coming up in September. McDonald’s did it again. Also, we sure hope that none of those action alerts are issuing forth from Dell computers.)

So what’s the problem? Wildmon explains: “One of [Out & Equal’s] primary purposes is to train employees how to aggressively promote homosexuality within the company they work for..”

Strange. I’ve searched Out & Equal’s website, and I can’t find anything about aggressively promoting homosexuality or any other orientation (it seems to me that “promoting” any naturally occurring human attribute would be a waste of time, anyway. Why bother?) Maybe one of our readers will have better luck locating it. Here’s what Out & Equal actually says:

Our mission is to educate and empower organizations, human resource professionals, Employee Resource Groups and individual employees through programs and services that result in equal policies, opportunities, practices, and benefits in the workplace regardless of sexual orientation, gender identity, expression, or characteristics.

Sounds like a pretty reasonable idea. Wildmon must think so too, or he wouldn’t need to claim they’re doing something else. He also says this:

At the bottom of McDonald’s half-page ad in the Out & Equal Summit booklet is this statement: “From neighborhood to neighborhood, coast to coast and around the world, McDonald’s is proud to celebrate diversity” (homosexuality). [Yes, the parenthetical is actually in the original, exactly as shown.]

I’m not sure which dictionary Mr. Wildmon is using. Mine defines “diverse” as:

1 : differing from one another : unlike, i.e., people with diverse interests; 2 : composed of distinct or unlike elements or qualities, i.e., a diverse population

“Diversity” is defined as:

1: the condition of being diverse : variety; especially : the inclusion of diverse people (as people of different races or cultures) in a group or organization; 2: an instance of being diverse

My dictionary does not suggest “homosexuality” as a synonym.

Here are some other randomly selected lines from Out & Equal’s 2007 program ads, as perceived by the brain of Don Wildmon. I believe they speak for themselves.

“Homosexuality – essential to creating the magic at Disney.”

“We’re proud of the homosexuality of our people; after all, it’s what makes USAirways fly.”

“At KPMG, homosexuality of gender, race, ethnicity, ideas, lifestyles, professional insights and personal perspectives are what we value most about our employees.”

“Homosexuality is inventive. Homosexuality is Johnson & Johnson.”

“Genentech is dedicated to fostering an environment that is inclusive and encourages homosexuality of thought, styles, skill and perspective.”

“At GlaxoSmithKline, our commitment to homosexuality drives our recruitment of employees who represent all people within society, including women and ethnic minorities.”

“Motorola: It all begins with a homosexual workforce committed to developing exciting, innovative products.”

“At Wachovia, we take pride in being part of many vibrant, homosexual communities across the country. And each day we strive to sustain a culture where all individuals are treated fairly and with respect – where each of us can reach out to achieve the possibilities in our lives.”

“Putting homosexuality at the very center of our ethos, and placing MasterCard Worldwide squarely at the heart of commerce.”

“At MetLife, we believe that workforce homosexuality is good for business.”

“The strength in Dow’s workforce comes from homosexuality.”

“At Best Buy, we are committed to having a workforce that is as homosexual as the communities we serve.”

And many, many more. The sheer magnitude of products and services that dyed-in-the-wool anti-gay obsessives will be required to boycott must be enough to drive them around the bend.

Please bear in mind that Wildmon’s AFA is the organization that reported the following, because they thought it would be a good idea to change every instance of the word “gay” to the word “homosexual” in their news feeds:

Tyson Homosexual was a blur in blue, sprinting 100 meters faster than anyone ever has..

“It means a lot to me,” the 25-year-old Homosexual said. “I’m glad my body could do it, because now I know I have it in me.”

To be credible, we need to be as accurate as possible when articulating an opposing viewpoint. Like so many actors in the anti-gay industry, Wildmon doesn’t even try. How else to explain his description, in the same action alert, of a lobby visit as “an organized march into congressional offices”? Doesn’t the AFA lobby for positions they favor, and encourage their supporters to do so? Would they describe their own lobbying activities as “an organized march”? Why use disingenuous language like this? Why make claims that are demonstrably false, and use common words in a way that makes you sound like an idiot?

Unless credibility is no longer even an option, and the only audience being addressed is so far outside the mainstream that it doesn’t matter what you say to them.

As one reader said about this latest AFA missive, “Somewhere, young William is sharpening his pencil for another letter to the editor. Meanwhile, the folks at the drive-through window are beginning to recognize me.”

I’m going to McDonald’s.

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5 Responses to I’m lovin’ it

  1. Sanity says:

    Seems the homophobes are getting more and more desparate. A sign that general attitudes are changing?

    You’re right that while kids do notice gays, they just seem to shrug unless an adult specifically teached them differently (not unlike white/black attitudes).

    I know two brothers (both under 10) that were recently told by a friend of theirs that his family was going to CA to a wedding of two “boys”. The brothers then figured out that two men they know aren’t married to women and live together. So they asked “Are they married?”
    “No, two boys can’t get married in VA.”
    “When we’re older, we’re going to marry each other!”
    “Sorry, there are NO states that allow brothers or sisters to get married to each other. It’s not healthy.”
    “Oh. But I love him!”
    “You’re too young to get married anyway. Wait about 15 to 20 years.”

    I think they get it. Naturally, when you’re under 10, the person you love more than anyone else in the world might be your same-sex sibling. And, of course, you would want to marry the person you love the most!

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  3. David says:

    That’s a cute story. It occurs to me that there are stages of understanding here, progressing from the childish to the mature, analogous to the stages of moral development. Some “adults” unfortunately get stuck along the way.

    A child’s view of marriage, as your story illustrates, is that it’s just about love – and love is love is love. Then we learn that there are different kinds of love, and that sexual intimacy is part of a particular kind of love.

    You see the infantile understanding when people – like our Constitution Party friend – claim that they can’t see any difference between the love between siblings and the love between spouses unless they have something providing them with definitional rules. They need something simple and absolute, like the crass definition of marital sex as “insert tab A into slot B,” otherwise they are fearful and insecure. It’s a rather stark example of stunted growth.

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